03
Sep
10

Results: Funfetti, Take Two

The ingredients for...

The reason for the delay in results posting is threefold: overworked (me), overtired (me), overfailure (cake).

We determined that I needed to continue this challenge with traditional and legitimate Funfetti. This meant that I had to walk allllllllllll the way to the grocery store to pick up a box.  I used that time to ponder my plan of attack, in which I would attack cake fails and potential food poisoning. 

My last attempt at crocking Funfetti never really set up or rose.  It was a total disaster, an epic loss, flecked with the colors of the rainbow.  I ate some of it anyway, because I am a fat kid and that is what fat kids do when they see cake.  I paid for that poor choice.

This time I was going to have my cake and eat it too.  I decided to prepare the cake mix as directed.  I even used canola oil, despite it not being my favorite.  I added the suggested amount of oil, along with the listed amounts of water and quantity of eggs.  I neither changed nor added anything.  This is extremely out of character for me, and is probably cause to worry.  I mixed the batter in my pink plastic bowl to console myself, as it’s definitely my cheeriest bowl. I generally think I know better than recipes; I generally probably do.

Once everything was mixed, I sprayed the crock insert of my crockpot.  My logic here was I would either be too busy eating cake to want to scrub it out or too busying being blue and I’m not so into the idea of cleaning with tears and Dawn.  Once the insert was properly prepared, I dumped my batter into it.  At this pre-bake point, everything was EXACTLY on target and pretty much identical to traditional cake prep.  

See, This is Vented

Based on suggestions I found via the internet, I vented the lid of my crockpot with a chopstick – the rational being that steam needed to escape and otherwise the cake wouldn’t firm up.  (This was an issue the last time I crocked cake.  It was spongy and flat and burned.)  Later, I decided that that wasn’t enough venting, so turned the lid sideways.  I thought about removing the lid entirely, but opted not to, as I didn’t want all of my heat to escape.  Heat is rather vital to cooking.

Cake After Crocking 32 Minutes - the Prescribed Oven Time.

The crocking process took a lot longer this time, although I also let it burn a lot more this time.  My cake rose and some bits were actually recognizable as cake.  Overall though, I had a lot of burn and very little cake.  The inverse ratio would have been a success.  Cake.  Fail. 

Note The Bits of Cake; Ignore the Majority of Not-Cake

I hate failing.  Hate, hate, hate it.  I’m not good at failing either, and I also hate not being good at things.  That’s a lot of hate.  One of my responses to intense hate and loathing is to eat…how unfortunate that my hate was rooted in a real catastro-cake.

Cake Fail.

Since failing, I have purchased two more boxes of Funfetti mix.  A crocked cake can happen and it will happen.  It just might take awhile and be preceded by a lot of less-than-edible results.  I need to focus on the fact that this attempt was much more successful than my first go, along with the fact that I did not get all sick from my little noms.

See, there were bits that were cake; I ate them

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